I need help with a Film question. All explanations and answers will be used to help me learn.
you can download my script (final draft file) from the link because I couldn’t upload it here:
http://www.filedropper.com/yetshesurvived
((here is the professor feedback:
The formatting has a lot of problems. Below are some key examples – not a complete list. To earn a high grade, I’ll expect you to correct all of the instances.
>EXT. OUTSIDE KAREN’S HOUSE – NOON
You don’t have to – you shouldn’t include “OUTSIDE” here. That’s what the EXT denotes.
>“She is a Sales Manager in a company and a very hardworking woman. She started her work about 2 years ago.”
This is completely wrong. It cannot be filmed. As I emphasized in class, this is the most important part of scriptwriting: writing filmable action. Review the screenplay formatting guide and pay attention to this: “Scene action should only deal with what is happening on the screen and must never stray into superfluous novelistic text related to character thoughts or back-story.” You need to either rewrite the action or get rid of these kinds of instancesthroughout the script. If it’s information the audience needs to have, you need to deliver it a different way, likely through character dialogue.
“as been living next door with his family for about 6 years. Karen has good relations with him and his family.”
Another example of un-filmable action. There’s a lot of it in the script. It’s all 100% wrong. You’ll want to fix it all.
There are a lot of extra blank lines throughout the script. You need to fix them all.
Characters are capitalized the first time they appear in action. Review the short guide posted on Blackboard and/or more closely review the handouts I provided in class.
The “MAN” at the beginning of the script is obviously “MIKE.” So, it’s not a generic MAN, it’s MIKE.
The script goes from outside Karen’s house to inside. You need a new scene heading when you do that because you’re going into a new location. There area lot of other places like this throughout the script.
The story is honestly a little boring. It is all basically just people taking. Have THINGS HAPPEN. Review the outline for the Simpsons episode I provided. Note how the middle of the story has lots of twists and turns. Go somewhere! Have something happen to a characters or characters. ))
The formatting issues are the most important. And be sure to better review all of the class handouts.
Attached is the format guide, assignment description
